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More Guitars Than Friends

by Anni Piper

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1.
Wonder Woman 02:44
As I'm flying away in my see through jet I'm cursing the day that we first met I'm a wonder woman I'm a wonder woman I'm a wonder woman I wonder what I saw in you I knew you'd been messing now I've got proof I caught you in my lariat of truth I'm a wonder woman I'' m a wonder woman, I'm a wonder woman I wonder what I saw in you I'm doing the math as I zip through the sky I look at the ex and can't work out why I'm a wonder woman I'm a wonder woman I'm a wonder woman I wonder what I saw in you
2.
3.
Buckle Bunny 02:43
I need a straight shooting all nighting boot scooting fist fighting cowboy honey for this buckle bunny A road killing bull riding beer swilling raw hiding boy to get next to me I need a hat headed red blooded unwedded mud covered cowboy honey for this buckle bunny Chaps in chaps is my number one fantasy I need a denim wearing whip cracking sandy hairing pistol packing cowboy honey for this buckle bunny A snake rattle barrel racing big saddle cattle chasing boy to get next to me I need a square dancing lasso tying stock branding leather drying Cowboy honey for this buckle bunny I need a corn fed bib and brace flannel shirt handsome face John Deere driving ace take me back to his place
4.
My dressing room's marked with a star coz the show all upon me depends Yet I realize around the twelfth bar now I have more more guitars than friends I have kept touch just as best as I'm able and I've tried so to make my amends But I'm wrapped up in my strings and my cables now I've more more guitars than friends I'm too tightly wound just too highly strung Who'd want to be around the woman I've become So I'm drinking alone in your city I buy postcards that I'll never send But I'll sing you a song of self pity Now I've more more guitars than friends I have more more guitars than friends
5.
Paper Bag 04:07
Paper bag, huh! I heard you got a new lady you've been taking all over town I left something you'll need boy in the kitchen in the third drawer down You always loved your eye candy the perfect 10 by your side was me And now when you're feeling randy you would settle for a negative three Before you take her into your bed just say baby put this on your head Cuz when you lay with that hag honey she must need a paper bag Her knuckles on the ground they drag honey she must need a paper bag I hope you forgive my laughter cuz at the end of the day Boy when you get what you're after it's like a hotdog down a hallway I heard about Medusa you got a harpy there in your home I bet the reason you want her is one look just turns you to stone Before you take her into your bed just say baby put this on your head Well her face it makes me want to gag, she must need a paper bag So have fun with your sloppy old slag, she must need a paper bag
6.
7.
I told my Daddy that the dry pastures got some wetting He stormed out to the barn he moved like he was jetting My boyfriend didn’t have a clue where this was heading This is what folks round here call a shotgun wedding My mama cried hey that’s my baby girl you’ve been bedding And free milk from the cow is something you ain’t getting Let’s not start our evening out with your bloodletting This is what folks round here call a shotgun wedding I sewed myself a veil out of mosquito netting We were married in the most romantic setting A Winchester aimed at the groom there’s no forgetting This is what folks round here call a shotgun wedding
8.
9.
Eugene 02:56
Eugene I know just where you been Eugene I know just where you been You left with a model she’s oh so tall Bet the two of you must’ve had a ball No you wasn’t thinking ‘bout me at all Eugene Eugene I know just where you been Eugene I know just where you been When you left with my cousin she was a virgin Yes you fixed that you needed no urging See the real man in you emerging Eugene Eugene I know just where you been Eugene I know just where you been You left with my best friend and her twin sister Know you done a whole lot more than kissed her Better be packing your things now mister Eugene Eugene I know just where you been Eugene I know just where you been You been with a model my cousin and my best friend All of your women drive me round the bend Take your cowboy hat boy cuz this is the end Eugene
10.
Blackberry brandy it’s all I’ll drink I’ll keep it handy so I don’t think About why I’m singing such a lonesome song With blackberry brandy I can’t go wrong Blackberry brandy it’s all I crave It’s fine and dandy but it’s an early grave I stayed away for just two postcards too long With blackberry brandy I can’t go wrong

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released March 14, 2020

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Anni Piper Portland, Oregon

She's the First Lady of the Blues! The Australian born sultry singer is also a solid bassist and insightful composer. Piper won an Australian Blues Music Award for her 2005 debut album. She was soon signed to boutique label Blues Leaf Records USA. The title track from 'Blow Up Doll' (April 2020 release) is a semi-finalist in the prestigious 2019 International Songwriting Competition. ... more

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